When the Dust Settles
by Kayryn
Summary: Never doubt and never look back. That's how I live my life." That's what Catherine said, but for some reason, I don't buy that. Episode addition to Strip Strangler


Disclaimer: Belongs to the CBS. Not mine. Never was, never will be.  
  
Author's note: 1) Haven't written anything in a while, and now I'm starting again, but very carefully. This is just a little scene that wouldn't let me be, so I had to write it. 2) Thanks to Allison for the beta! ;)  
  
RATED: G  
  
Timeline: Basically right after the season 1 finale, "The Strip Strangler".  
  
Summary: "Never doubt and never look back. That's how I live my life." That's what Catherine said, but for some reason, I don't buy that.  
  
  
  
When the Dust Settles  
  
By: Kay Shadow  
  
"Okay, later guys," Sidle hollered across the parking lot.  
  
Warrick raised his hand and waved goodbye to her and Nick who was catching a ride with her, then bidding 'goodnight' to his boss made his way to his own car.  
  
Gil was left standing at the parking lot, wearing a bemused expression on his face. Another night over, another case solved. This time solving the case meant another dead body, but their expertise wouldn't be needed in solving what had happened.  
  
It wasn't more than two hours before that he'd thought he was going to get to know how a shovel fit his head. For the umpteenth time since then he silently thanked Catherine for showing up when she did. A second or two later and she would have found him dead.  
  
He was about to go to his car when he noticed Cath sitting in hers. Grissom waved her goodnight, but she didn't seem to see him. In fact, she was just staring ahead, not showing any sign of starting the car, let alone leaving the parking lot.  
  
Gil remembered her words from earlier, "Never doubt and never look back. That's how I live my life." He knew tonight was the first time Catherine had ever had to fire her gun while on duty. Which meant it was the first time she'd shot anyone. Gil knew from experience that it wasn't an easy thing to accept and was afraid Cath would have a hard time coming to terms with her actions, despite her words to him. Pushing aside the creeping hesitation of whether or not he would know how to offer help - if she needed any - Gil approached the car with determination. Cath had been there for him on so many occasions that she deserved to have him at least try. Even if he wasn't the most eloquent conversationalist.  
  
Reaching the car, Gil stood outside the driver's side door, but after getting no reaction from her opened it. When Catherine still gave no sign that she'd noticed him, he finally touched her shoulder, shaking her slightly.  
  
"Catherine. Hey, can you hear me?"  
  
Startled, she looked up at him. "Yeah. what is it?"  
  
"Is.. umm.. is everything okay?" He asked, withdrawing his hand.  
  
Catherine, who was still clearly dazed, nodded, "Yeah. Why?"  
  
"I just noticed you weren't showing any signs of going anywhere. I know you wanted to take Lindsey to school, so I was just wondering."  
  
Knowing she was getting defensive, Catherine tried to hold her tongue, but the events of the last few hours got the better of her. "Look," she snapped, "I said I'm fine! Quit harassing me!"  
  
Grissom raised his hands as a sign of peace, "Cath, I'm not trying to harass you. I'm just worried, with good reason."  
  
She frowned at him at first but then her face softened and he knew he was getting through to her.  
  
"I'm just worried," he repeated quietly. "I know you said you're okay with what happened, but I also know this was the first time you've ever had to fire a weapon on duty."  
  
Though his voice was soft and gentle, the words seemed to penetrate her walls and her eyes started to water up. Feeling compelled to alleviate her pain somehow, but unsure what he should do or say, Gil settled for pulling her diminutive body to his larger frame, hugging her and he felt her wrap her arms around him, holding him close as well. A quiet sob escaped her, but it was enough to release the dam, and burying her face into his shirt, Cath let the tears come freely. At first she didn't seem to be able to stop crying so Gil kept holding on to her, soothing her by whispering reassuring words to her all the while stroking her back comfortingly.  
  
After a while Catherine finally looked up at him, tears still running down her cheeks. "I killed him. I killed someone, Gil. I've spent years trying to help capture people who kill others so that they can be locked up for punishment, and suffer the consequences and now I've taken a life."  
  
Looking into her eyes, Gil tenderly brushed away her tears with his hand before he hesitantly leaned forward and kissed the top of her head. Then, letting his hand drop down an inch or two he let his fingers linger on her skin.  
  
"And by doing so, you saved mine."  
  
The end 


End file.
